Hi there, fresh, steaming-hot subscribers. Welcome to the first EVER Horrific/Terrific.
This week’s rating: sort of okay, I guess (FYI that’s the middle one). Why?
- Libra = Diem now, and could launch in January
- AWS is starving your pets (it’s funny AND sad)
- Amnesty is trying to block a Google acquisition — good luck with that
⚖️ Facebook are finally launching Libra this January… woo?
Perhaps you remember when Facebook first announced Libra: it was going to be a cryptocurrency based on a salad of real-world currencies, and would totally disrupt currency as we know it (god, I love disrupting things. When I first heard the news last year, it disrupted the coffee right out of my mouth). Now it will just be based on the US dollar, like regular, loser currency (except… it’s v i r t u a l).
Other cool facts
- A re-naming convention: Libra is now called Diem. The Libra Association is now called the Diem Association. You know, just to cement the idea that everything is different now, even though regulators and global banks still hate this idea.
- You will be able to send Diem tokens via Whatsapp and Facebook Messenger, as well as the Novi app (Novi is the wallet, formerlly Calibra) — because the one thing missing from those apps was cryptocurrency integration
- While in the middle of their Slack acquisition talks, Salesforce are also going to use Diem, somehow…
Okay great but what’s Diem even for?
I thought that was obvious. I have two theories. It’s to…
- Bank the unbanked, and use technology to make the world a better place.
- OR keep Facebook relevant and powerful
(I think it’s numer two).
Just incase you weren’t annoyed enough…
Facebook have also just acquired a company called Kustomer, who specialise in integrating customer interactions across channels. Something that they DEFINITELY want to be good at if their ‘interoperability’ between Messenger, Instagram, and Whatsapp is actually going to be a thing. Dear everyone powerful who wants to ‘break up’ Facebook: seems like this is an acquisition you should have tried to block, no? 🤔. Ah well, better luck next time.
💊 Amazon has started being a phramacy in the US, but hey, at least AWS went down for several hours the other day
Hahaha, sucks for them. No, wait… if you are the undisputed leader of all web hosting, this is actually sort of bad. But also funny. But also… still bad. Let’s see:
- It’s almost as if being the one and only cloud platform that nearly everyone in the world uses is a not a good idea. Just think of all the interconntected IoT devices that failed because of this, or, worse…
- NETFLIX — oh my god. Luckily for me, the UK was unaffected by this incident but Netflix is, of course, one of AWS’s biggest customers…
- One user’s automatic pet feeder stopped working, so they had to rush home to feed their pet themselves. Firstly, this is a pandemic, so they should have already been home. Secondly, imagine designing a pet feeder that needs to be connected to the internet to work?
If you think this means their power is wavering, don’t worry, it’s definitely not. Amazon will now deliver medicine to the US citizens who are willing to connect their insurance plans. Fact: buying everything on Amazon is cheap and convenient, and I have trouble foreseeing any problems with this.
Hello dystopia: But, it would be really shit for AWS to go down just when you run out of your heart medication, wouldn’t it?
Amnesty International calling to block the Google Fitbit acquisition
They wrote this letter to the EU competition regulator. I wonder… are smaller companies competing with each other to be the best, or just to be bought by Google? Who cares! Being bought by Google is the BE$T.
Can’t be bothered to read the letter? I don’t blame you. The gist: “Jeez Google, perhaps if your business model wasn’t to consistently surveil your users, you wouldn’t be so desperate to acquire heaps of valuable health data, all in one go.” Well put, Amnesty.
Anyway, this piece of news has not upgraded this week’s rating to ‘Good, I think?’ because this means nothing unless the acquisition is actually blocked
Special bonus thing
A product I’ve noticed this week: Masterworks. Where you can FINALLY invest in art via an app! This probably sits at the most nose-bleedy peak of aspirational; invest in art, like rich people do, and also: you can’t just GET the app, you have to request an invitation — wow!
Thank you for reading, see you next week when I might bother to embed gifs, or something.